The Sex Doctor  A doctor had the reputation of helping couples increase the joy in their sex life, but always promised not to take a case if he felt he  could not help them. The Browns came to see the doctor, and he gave   them thorough physical exams, psychological exams, and various tests  and then concluded, "Yes, I am happy to say that I believe I can help you.       "On your way home from my office stop at the grocery store and buy  some       grapes and some doughnuts. Go home, take off your clothes, and you,       sir, roll the grapes across the floor until you make a bulls eye in      your wife's love canal. "Then on hands and knees you must crawl to her      like a leopard and retrieve the grape using only your tongue".       "Then next, ma'am, you must take the doughnuts and from across the  room, toss them at your husband until you make a ringer around his love pole. "Then like a lioness, you must crawl to him and consume the doughnut."       The couple went home and their sex life became more and more wonderful.        They told their friends, Mr. & Mrs. Green that they should see the  good       doctor. The doctor greeted the Greens and said he would not take the       case unless he felt that he could help them; so he conducted the       physical exams and the same battery of tests.         Then he told the Greens the bad news. "I cannot help you, so I will  not       take your money". I believe your sex life is as good as it will ever  be. I cannot help.       "The Greens pleaded with him, and said, "You helped our friends the Browns, now please, please help us."        "Well, all right", the doctor said. "On your way home from the office, stop at the grocery store and buy some apples and a box of cheerios..."