The Sex Doctor
A doctor had the reputation of helping couples
increase the joy in
their sex life, but always promised not to take a
case if he felt he
could not help them. The Browns came to see
the doctor, and he gave
them thorough physical exams, psychological
exams, and various tests
and then concluded, "Yes, I am happy to say
that I believe I can help you.
"On your way home
from my office stop at the grocery store and buy some
grapes and some doughnuts.
Go home, take off your clothes, and you,
sir, roll the grapes
across the floor until you make a bulls eye in
your wife's love canal.
"Then on hands and knees you must crawl to her
like a leopard and retrieve
the grape using only your tongue".
"Then next, ma'am, you must take
the doughnuts and from across
the room, toss them at your husband until you
make a ringer around his
love pole. "Then like a lioness, you must crawl to
him and consume the doughnut."
The couple went home
and their sex life became more and more wonderful.
They told their friends,
Mr. & Mrs. Green that they should see the good
doctor. The doctor
greeted the Greens and said he would not take the
case unless he felt
that he could help them; so he conducted the
physical exams and
the same battery of tests.
Then he told the Greens
the bad news. "I cannot help you, so I will not
take your money".
I believe your sex life is as good as it will ever be.
I cannot help.
"The Greens pleaded
with him, and said, "You helped our
friends the Browns, now please, please help us."
"Well, all right", the doctor
said. "On your way home from the
office, stop at the grocery store and buy some apples
and a box of