California:
 1.  Community leaders passed an ordinance that makes it illegal for anyone to try
      and stop a child from playfully jumping over puddles of water.

 Connecticut:
 1.  You can be stopped by the police for biking over 65 miles per hour.
 2.  You are not allowed to walk across a street on your hands.

 Florida:
 1.  Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the
      salon owner.
 2.  A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday
      or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
 3.  If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has
      to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.
 4.  SARASOTA:  It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
 5.  Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.

 Illinois:
 1.  It is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats,
     and other domesticated animal kept as pets.

 Indiana:
 1.  Bathing is prohibited during the winter.
 2.  Citizens are not allowed to attend a movie house or theater nor ride
      in a public streetcar within at least four hours after eating garlic.

 Iowa:
 1.  Kisses may last for as much as, but no more than, five minutes.

 Kentucky:
 1.  By law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she
      "cannot hold onto the ground."
 2.  It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.

 Louisiana:
 1.  It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller
     with a water pistol.
 2.  Biting someone with your natural teeth is "simple assault," while
      biting someone with your false teeth is "aggravated assault."

 Massachusetts:
 1.  Mourners at a wake may not eat more than three sandwiches.
 2.  Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed an securely locked.
 3.  An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a
      special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.

 Nebraska:
 1.  A parent can be arrested if his child cannot hold back a burp during
      a church service.

 New Mexico:
 1.  Females are strictly forbidden to appear unshaven in public.

 New York:
 1.  A fine of $25 can be levied for flirting.  This old law specifically
     prohibits men from turning around on any city street and looking "at
     a woman in that way."  A second conviction for a crime of this
     magnitude calls for the violating male to be forced to wear a "pair of
     horse-blinders" wherever and whenever he goes outside for a stroll.

 North Dakota:
 1.  Beer & pretzels can't be served at the same time in any bar or restaurant.

 Ohio:
 1.  Women are prohibited from wearing patent leather shoes in public.

 Oklahoma:
 1.  Violators can be fined, arrested or jailed for making ugly faces at a dog.
 2.  Females are forbidden from doing their own hair without being
      licensed by the state.
 3.  Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate
      in groups of three or more on private property.

 Pennsylvania:
 1.  A special cleaning ordinance bans housewives from hiding dirt and
      dust under a rug in a dwelling.
 2.  No man may purchase alcohol without written consent from his wife.
 
Texas:
 1.  A city ordinance states that a person cannot go barefoot without
      first obtaining a special five-dollar permit.
 2.  It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.

 Vermont:
 1.  Lawmakers made it obligatory for everybody to take at least one bath
     each week -- on Saturday night.

 Washington:
 1.  All lollipops are banned.
 2.  A law to reduce crime states: "It is mandatory for a motorist with
     criminal intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the
     chief  of police as he is entering the town.

 West Virginia:
 1.  No children may attend school with their breath smelling of "wild onions."