The general was confined to the military hospital for treatment
of a minor malady.
 
For almost a week he made a complete nuisance of himself, irritating
 both staff and the other patients, demanding attention and expecting
 his every order to be followed immediately.
He was in a six-man ward rather than a private room, his meals were too cold
or not served to suit his taste, the light needed to be
adjusted to his demands, the nighttime activities interfered with his rest...
     and on, and on.
 
     One afternoon an orderly entered the room. "Time to take your
     temperature, General."
 
     After growling at the orderly, the general opened his mouth to
accept the thermometer.
 
     "Sorry, General, but for this test we need your temperature
from the other end."
 
     A whole new barrage of verbal abuse followed, but the orderly
     was insistent that a rectal temperature was what the test called for.
 
     The general at last rolled over, bared his rear, and allowed
     the orderly to proceed. The orderly then told the general, "Stay
exactly like that and don't move. I'll be back in five minutes
to check up on you" and withdrew.
 
     An hour later, the head nurse entered the room, saw the general
with  his bare rear in the air and gasped, "What's going on here?"
 
     "Haven't you ever seen someone having their temperature taken?"
the general barked.
 
     "Yes I have, General, but with a daffodil?"